Thursday, January 30, 2014

Honesty, Transparency, and Facebook

When it comes to honesty and transparency on the internet, specifically Facebook:  how much is too much?

Everyone will have a different opinion.  "You don't have to share everything on Facebook." is a sentence I hear a lot in my home.  To which I usually reply, "Why not?  I have nothing to hide."  After last Saturday night, I'm pretty sure there's nothing left to hide!

Was it a mistake to be on Facebook while drinking?  Maybe, but on the flip side of that I had some great friends who weathered the storm with me and are very forgiving.  I am not a heavy drinker, and it doesn't take much for me to start slurring my words and walking wobbly.  And Saturday I had considerably more than a little.  I had an emotional meltdown online.  Looking back at some of the conversations I had that night, I was coming unhinged!  I really do have some awesome friends who care about me.

And I don't even want to talk about the typos.  Just "omg" is all I'll say on that matter!

Part of me is embarrassed.  I said things that I normally would have left floating in my head.  Or rather, I wrote them.  I usually tend to over think - well, everything - and that is actually one of my biggest personal character flaws:  I hold too much inside - and so every once in a while, I spew.  Add wine to that, and it's a full blown lava flow.
my own personal truth serum...  :/

Add to that I'm trying to establish an online presence as an author, kind of making myself a public figure.  I'm not very "famous", and don't expect to be, although it could very well happen.  And so I should be more responsible, because we expect our public figures to be perfect.  This is why so many 'smart' ones stay out of social media (Chris Pine), and even those who do come on the internet - they don't say much.  I've only seen a few tweets from Stephen King.  Same with Frank Peretti and Ted Dekker.

But the flip side to all that, is why should I be embarrassed by my humanity?  So I'm having problems right now - who doesn't?  And so I might maybe be having trouble dealing with them well - no one does that all the time!  I've always been open and honest about my feelings and the problems I have.  Of course, it did get me into a lot of trouble in my old church.  I was labeled "emotional" as though it was a bad word.  Hey, I've read the same bible they do and God and Jesus both seem to be pretty emotional to me.  Jesus routinely had to "flee" from people and get by Himself, and He wasn't afraid to cry, in public.  Of course, we always over-spiritualize it: it's okay for Him to do those things, He's Jesus.  We're only supposed to follow His example up to a point.  We're only supposed to model the happy but serious Jesus.

But I digress.  One thing I don't want to do is get tangled in religious differences here.  Or political.  I'm a storyteller though, and I tend to tell stories mostly on myself.

One thing people will get from me, regardless of whether it's 'wise' or not, is going to be honesty and transparency.  I have no problem being "real" here.  I think more is needed on the internet, and Facebook (don't 'friend' me just to sell me something, that irritates me).  I may not always tell you every detail, out of respect for others involved, but when it comes to myself - I have no problem laying it all out.  If David Hayward is the nakedpastor, then I guess I'll be a "naked author"!  I'm not even going to google that to see if it's already used!

It may not always be pretty, but it'll be real.  And my blog description does say that this is about my "adventure" into self publication.  And trust me, this is all connected.  I'm kind of in the crappy part of the adventure at the moment, but no adventure is all flowers and champagne!

2014 - Can Change Its Tune Any Time Now