Two Frustrating Days Caused Me To Go Offline

Frustration upon frustration!  Doctor's appointments and tax appointments!

Not only did I not post here, but I didn't get my post on Broads of a Feather done.  I haven't been on Google+, or Twitter.  I've posted a few things on Facebook, reaching out to friends and trying to de-stress.  And I didn't always make good decisions, but hey we're all human - ish.

Tired but adorable :)

Time has not been my friend since Thursday afternoon.  Getting mother to the doctor's was no problem, and when I had barely say down to check my Facebook notifications and they called us back, I figured it was going to be a quick and easy in and out appointment.  Not so fast there!  An hour later I was ready to crawl up the walls as the doctor still had not made his appearance.  Only to learn he wouldn't do anything for her except change her medicines. Friday's appointment went smoother, but I still didn't get home until almost the same time that I did Thursday night.  So tired I was ready to cry.

No, wait - I did cry.  Nevermind!  

I did have a short work day morning yesterday, and the hubby wanted to hang out for a while after I got home.  That's always nice.  And I did get on the computer later in the evening with the intent of writing, but my Facebook addiction got in the way. Facebook and I have a very love/hate relationship - kind of like me and my iPhone!  I only have it open on my phone at the moment, and that's easier to ignore.

I'm not sure if things are stabilizing out in my life, or if it's just a brief lull.  Those happen and I never trust them.  I intend on making the most of it though.  There's no telling how long it's going to last.

Sometimes there are too many things in life to balance.

Going to go work on my other blog post now.

2014 - Back After These Messages

Realizing I Might Not Be Clear

Sometimes I forget that you all can't see through your computer screen and see what I'm trying to say.  I realized this today.

I know that I've commented and maybe complained quite a bit about my husband's noisy gaming - but failed

Does this do funny things to your eyes?  This is how I feel!

to mention that this is in the same room as our computer.  Maybe this is self explanatory to some, but that doesn't mean it is to everyone and really I ought to be more clear.  We are probably maybe six feet apart from each other.

It is cramped quarters to be sure.  It would be worse had he not knocked the wall out a few years ago.  One of many projects he has started but never finished.  I sit almost in the spot where the old closet used to be!  I did give much thought today about rearranging our rooms, but if I do that it won't be until the weekend.  If we don't work on Saturday.  There were ????'s on the schedule today - ugh!

He's not always noisy when he plays; it's when he's in an Xbox Live party and they're all chatting and planning and squabbling like the children they tend to act like.  Most of his friends are over eighteen, but not all.  There are a few teens in the group.  But that doesn't mean anything!  I swear, when I drove school bus seven some years ago, those kids were better behaved than some of this crew!

I have a few things in mind for tomorrow's post on Broads of a Feather.  Just a reminder that I won't be posting here tomorrow.  I might even write it out by hand tonight, so all I have to do is copy it over.  It's a little easier that way.  I actually printed off a few pages of my story and took them into work with me today to work on during breaks.  I didn't get anything new written yet, but I did do some editing and reworded a few sentences.  There's a possibility that I'll just be signing off the computer in a few minutes and just take my papers down to the bedroom and write there.  Heck, most of the first book was written in notebooks on break at the Manor when I worked as a nurse's aide!

Whatever it takes, right?

2014 ~ Full Speed Ahead

Learning to Balancing Work, Home, and Hobby

I was not writing when I met my husband.

Nothing fictional, at least.  Just the random odd poem.  Which for me is nowhere near as consuming as fiction writing.  With poetry, I just poor out whatever it is I am feeling and it's done.  With fiction, it's world creating ~ It's intrigue and drama and romance ~ It draws me into my characters thoughts, emotions, dreams, and fears!  My characters are so real to me!

So when I downloaded my rough draft of Farmer's Daughter early last year and was totally consumed by it, he was - not surprised exactly, but it was something new to him.  While he supports me in my writing, I'm not sure it's something he completely understands.  You might understand me when I say 'consumed', especially if you're a fellow writer or reader.  But he's not and he always looks a little confused when I talk about it.  We've argued about how much time I spend on the computer a few times, and he always throws my own lines back at me about getting out and living life and not rotting on the Xbox.  Hmm, not sure they compare and I feel after ten years of writer's block I'm entitled to a break from "real life".

But I value my relationship with him, so I try to balance my time on the computer with the rest of life.  It's hard when he doesn't cooperate!

It shouldn't be hard: balancing work, home, and the hobby I'm trying to turn into a career.

I mean, yes, I work a full time job.  Only 40 hours during a good week, but we haven't really had too many of those since they consolidated the first and second shifts of my department.  45 hours has become our norm; although the cold weather gave us an unusually short week last week.  That translates into 9 hours days.  Like so many, I come home tired and not wanting to do anything.

Did I mention she was cute too???

Home is just my husband and I, and our hyper and attention loving dog Jaclyn.  I do the bulk of the chores, when I feel like it.  Mostly I just come home, walk the dog, eat my supper, and go on the computer.  Not that I always get much accomplished.  At least at this moment as I write this I only have to deal with his conversation over the Xbox and not his comedy channel on his Pandora radio app.  The comedy channel is like a TV show - it sucks me right in and I get distracted.  Sometimes because it's actually funny.  Other times the humor is just insolent and it makes me angry.

And now my author friend and I are undertaking our joint "Broads of a Feather" venture.  Which by the way, she put her post up today!  I will probably post on Thursday and drop posting here on that day.  I will make that decision for sure tomorrow and include it in tomorrow's post.  It will be exciting when we have more members to our group!  More writers to chat with, share ideas with, and just have fun together!

One way or another, I will learn this balancing act.  Even if it means quieting the hubby with duct tape or shutting off the power again. ;)  There are many things he could do to help me, but I'm afraid that as much as he 'supports' me - I'm on my own.  If I succeed, then great.  If not, oh well.

But see, I'm set on succeeding!  I'm set on proving every naysayer in my life wrong.  Because I know that I can do this.  I can see my dream become a reality, and become even more than I expected.  Because I'm a writer, I'm also a dreamer.

And I dream pretty big.

2014 - Full Speed Ahead!

Tomorrow's Post

Tomorrow's post will be about balancing work and home and hobby as I try to turn that hobby into a career.

Pizza, Wine, and a Movie Make for an Interesting Recharging Weekend

I'm not sure who found last night more interesting, my husband or my friends on Facebook.

One way I recharge my brain is to stop using it.  It is just like any muscle and gets tired and needs to rest once in a while, something my 11th grade English teacher agreed with me on once.  So Friday night, I watched my beloved CSI: NY on Netflix and just relaxed my brain.

Relationships are tricky things.  When I realized how my Saturday was going to go, I left my computer and retreated to my bedroom and TV again.  Watched a movie on Netflix, which did not live up to my expectations.  I was expecting Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters to be - better.  I don't know, it just felt like a caricature and didn't have any real depth.  But that's just my opinion.  And I really had a problem with how the women were treated.  Maybe appropriate for the apparent time period, but man it really made me angry!

And when things in the other end of the house hadn't improved, I went on a quick shopping trip and picked up a pizza and a Chris Pine movie (This Means War, which was okay, again not as good as I was expecting, but it wasn't as big of a let down as the other movie) and bottle of wine.  And once again retreated into my bedroom.

I don't drink often, and have only been drunk a hand full of times in my life.  Which since I didn't start drinking at all until I was 30, I'm not sure if that's impressive or not.  But I deliberately got drunk, knowing that it would lower my inhibitions enough to say and do things that would get my husband's attention.  Thinking my flipping the main power breaker to our house kind of did the trick.

Of course, the entire time I was drinking I was on Facebook making silly statuses and leaving hilarious comments on other's statuses.  It is probably the best time I've ever had while drinking!

Thankfully I didn't have a bad hangover this morning.  My head felt a little fuzzy for a while but it didn't really hurt.  I never threw up, though I felt like passing out about 2:30/3 in the morning.  Which was a little odd, but it passed.

I've also felt really tired today, and I think I napped from about 10:30 to noon.  And when I woke up from that nap, I don't know - I just felt better mentally.  I finished the new scenes that I tried starting yesterday.

While it wasn't something I had planned on doing, it did work.  I don't know that it's something I would recommend for others, or even try again!  Sometimes doing something out of the ordinary is just what a person needs, but that's going to be something different for each person.

Back to working on my story!

2014 ~ Full Speed Ahead

Taking Time to Recharge My Brain

Short and sweet is how I'm keeping it tonight.  Not sure what is going on, but I need a break from the computer.  My brain is just mushy and I don't like it when that happens.  And I've got a lot of good thoughts, but they'll need to wait.  I'll be back tomorrow.

In the meantime, here's a pic of how I started to recharge my brain!  The box said the color was supposed to be burgundy, but it turned out more of an auburn.  Which I'm totally cool with!  If I could pull off a true red, I would!

I am beautiful.

2014 ~ Back After These Messages

Early Day Opens Afternoon For Play...Or Shopping With Mom

I'm not saying that shopping with my Mom isn't fun, but it's not my first pick of what I would have done this afternoon.

Work got out super early, after 4.5 hours instead of 8.  With the extreme weather in our corner of the world, we weren't able to get all the cows that we were supposed to.  Mostly due to the highways in New York being shut down.  But enough about work!  Blah!!!

Not saying how nice today was.  :)

One of the first things I do when getting out of work is to check my phone for messages.  Mom had called to let me know that the doctor's office had called and rescheduled her appointment.  Had I thought of it, I could have told her that we were expecting an early day today.  But she didn't know, so she turned down the earlier appointment and rescheduled for next week.  Which isn't really too bad.  I thought about hopping on the computer and getting started on all my stuff, but then she mentioned some shopping she needed to do.

Since I am borrowing her vehicle at the moment, it's only right that I take her where she needs to go while I have it.  So I ate some lunch and drove on up and brought her back into town.  It wasn't a bad way to spend the afternoon.  We had some good conversations.  I got to tell her about my latest writing venture, Broads of a Feather.  She liked the sounds of it as well.

So I am just now getting around to getting stuff done on the computer.  I hope I get to some actual writing tonight.  +MJ Bush gave me some articles to read and an assignment to write my midpoint for my second novel...which I've been thinking on and have some good ideas and just have to get time to write.  And a quiet husband, but I'm sure you're all tired of hearing about his Xbox addiction.  I know I sure am!  I'll do earplugs soon if I have to.

One thing about the midpoint spot for my novel...I've wrote the part where Craig realizes what's going on, but that's too late to be midpoint.    So I have to figure out something sooner, either Angela's realization of what's going on...or just give the audience a glimpse while keeping the characters clueless.

I can do this!




2013 ~ Full Speed Ahead