What's the Deal?

If you follow me on either Facebook or Twitter, you may have seen my pics where I've been showing off a couple of tiara's that I bought myself. And you may be wondering...why?

The shortest answer would be: Because I wanted to. But that would hardly make much of a blog post, now would it?

They popped up on one of the shopping apps I have on my phone, and since they were cheap and I had the money, I made the purchase. I thought to myself, why not? Jo March in Little Women had her writer's cap complete with a feather in it, why can't I have a writing tiara? Especially since sparkles make me happy?

Josephine March is probably one of my favorite literary heroines. I easily identified with her growing up. We were both writers, both women who didn't fit the typical female stereotype...although I wasn't quite the tomboy Jo was, I certainly had similar growing pains as a woman.

When your mom tells you to smile...

It may seem silly to some. They are free to have their own opinion and I thank them for keeping it to themselves. Where I am at in my depression, I will do whatever silly little thing I want to bring myself even the smallest amount of happiness. Especially since my husband says I look good in a tiara and thinks I should have worn my star and moon one to a recent wedding; he doesn't understand how that could be seen as upstaging the bride, and I didn't want to do that as I would like my new sister-in-law to actually like me someday.

Another thing I have done just to make myself happy would be increasing the Christmas decorations on my writing desk. It's October and some people think Christmas should stay hidden until December - or at the very least the end of November after Thanksgiving. They too are free to have their own opinion, but Christmas is my favorite holiday. So. It's not like I've put up a Christmas tree, just a few empty candy tins and a lit up house. And a sparkly angel. And the decorative tree I leave up all year. Just a few items that bring me happiness.

It's not going to make me a better writer, but I'll settle for happier. At least, less depressed. I've switched up when I'm taking my thyroid meds to ensure that they're being taken on an empty stomach. I was being very careless about that when I was taking them before bed, so I'm hoping once I adjust to the new morning time that my depression will ease up. If not, then I'll have to talk to my doctor about other options.

Because the depression I've been dealing with recently has been crazy! I'm going to blame it on the change of life hormones triggered by the loss of my ovaries. Sounds good to me, even though depression is something I've struggled with for as long as I can remember. I even logged into the Suicide Prevention chat line one night, just because I wanted someone to talk to...but there were 74 people in line ahead of me so I decided to just write a poem, eat my last fudgesicle and go to bed. I'm not sure that I felt any better the next day, but I am today so there is that much.

The wedding cake tower at my
brother's wedding last Saturday.

I have been splitting my time between proofing and editing the first two books and writing new material in the third. I've found the easiest way to proof the PDF or Kindle version is on my smartphone so I can take screenshots and write my notes on the pic. I questioned our pricey purchanse of the Galaxy Note 8 earlier this year, but for me, they were well worth the purchase.

Some days I am pulled in one direction more than the other - I'll get caught up in editing one day, writing new the next. And life is still happening around me...places to go and people to see. Weddings to go to and doctor appointments. We are one day closer to going to truck driving school, with a few more things to tick off the 'to-do' list so it's paid for. And then I'll have another new schedule to adjust to!

But I will manage somehow and my books will be finished and released. I just don't have an exact day yet.