A New Chapter Closer to Home

Some time before Jaclyn died, I had a long talk with Mr. Janney about how I was feeling burnt out from our job. Constantly being on the road as an over the road trucker, and getting little sleep in the sleeper bunk was wearing me down. I expressed my desire to find a local driving job so I could see family a little more often and be closer to home in case of emergencies. And to sleep in a bed that didn't move! He said he understood and while he was disappointed not having me along, he'd be okay if I found a local job.

What new sights will we see today?

So I began the hunt somewhat half-heartedly. I did enjoy seeing the country and being with my husband even if I didn't get to see him except at shift changes, and having my dog along. And then, as you know, Jaclyn died and my heart left me. I had this huge hole that felt as though someone had scooped it out with a dull spoon.

Jaclyn loved traveling with us, but she also loved coming home. She didn't care where we were, she just loved being with us.

Mr. Janney thinks I would have found the job I did no matter what, and he may be right since it was really kind of a fluke. I mainly looked at Facebook job ads, applying to ones that looked like they'd be worth the job change.

So, long story short, for those who don't know me on Facebook, neither my husband or I drive over the road any more. Initially he wasn't going to come with me, but there was a little accident at the end of May. I still have a mark in my armpit from where I was tossed against the truck dash due to a very slight but very sudden stop. If you've ever been injured on the job, you can imagine the nightmare that made our lives. We were already in a financial hole due to our truck being broken down for over half a month and being reduced to one income for just over a week hurt it even more. Between that and how I was treated by the worker's comp department, Mr. Janney decided to make the job move with me. I don't thing the worker's comp people did anything wrong, it's just the person who I dealt with had very little patience with an injured person in severe pain.

The new job has changed our lives for the better. Better pay, for less hours. Most of the time. Occasionally we have a long day, but they happen much less than they did over the road. All we do is drive to a distribution center to deliver a loaded trailer, switch it for an empty one and drive back to home base with it. We don't get the scenery we did out west, but being home at the end of each shift is worth it.

We now have a five day work week and two days off. While our weekend is actually Thursday and Friday, it's not too bad. We started out working nights, running from 7pm to finish. It was harder for Mr. Janney, but even I had trouble feeling sleepy after midnight regardless of having a good day's sleep beforehand.

A local sunset. Just as pretty as anywhere else.

But that has changed and now we start at 3am. While I'm not impressed with the poor communication and execution of the change, I think once we get used to the new schedule it'll be a good change. While the traffic tends to suck more during the day, heavier and stupider, it is better driving in the daylight. Once the sun comes up. Those early morning hours are still dark, and as we approach winter sunrise will be later and later, but it's easier to face those hours at the beginning of the shift rather than the end. I think (hope) we will have more energy after work, and hope that it will restart my writing my work in progress. More about that another time.

Another difference between jobs is we've downsized from driving a sleeper rig to driving what's known as a day cab. It's weird having windows behind us rather than a sleeper bunk, especially if we have to bobtail (drive with no trailer attached) because during dark hours headlights from other vehicles can shine in! It can be startling sometimes. Hopefully less of that now that we're on days.

The different rig means that I had to get used to backing again. Mr. Janney had to as well, but he was always quicker/better at backing than I was. I struggled with it for...okay, I still struggle with it. But it is easier to back with a day cab than a sleeper once you get the hang of it and I've gotten better than I was in the beginning. I think Mr. Janney was more worried about my backing up alone than he was for himself. We'd always had the agreement out on the road that if we needed someone to spot for us in a tight spot it was okay to wake the sleeping partner up.

Also, it is TONS easier backing in the daylight rather than the middle of the night. Not all of the lots are well lit, including our home terminal. And, if we're going to the same place we're usually there around the same time as each other and can help each other out if needed. When we were on nightshift, there was one time he came back to the drop are with his rig and empty trailer just to shine his headlights on the empty spot I was in so I could have some light...the lights in the lot weren't on for some reason, the night after this they were, go fig.

As I write this, we have an unexpected day off. In place of the text message giving us our run information this morning, we received one saying we were off. Since we are guaranteed a certain amount in our paycheck each week, this is no big deal. We get a free day and still get something for it.  After sleeping in a bit, Mr. Janney is gaming, and I'm finishing this post while Star Trek: Deep Space Nine plays in the background. I have book three's file open, and hope to do more than just scan what I've already written and tweak it. One can hope.

Until next time, stay safe!

Part 3 - Why the Changes?

Why did I change names, (Sara to Maeve, Jannie to Jeannie), personalities (Maude and her mother Pearl have been reversed a bit, Philip's protectiveness of his daughter is more prevalent) and either change or speed up plot points?

Sheesh, where to begin?

I have hated naming my characters ever since the first release of Farmer's Daughter because I was asked if I had used so many family names on purpose. Uhg, no. While I put more thought into some names than others - Angela's names are all symbolic of who she is and what she represents to Craig...including the Hebraic etymology of Carman, although that's something I only just found out (talk about a collective consciousness)...and her name change from Carman to Moore is just as symbolic.

I specifically chose Craig because of the etymology of the name (it means Rock) and not because I have a cousin Craig. I was probably choosing family names, even though I was nearly estranged from my family at the conception of the story and it's early germination because they're names I'm comfortable with. My character Craig certainly doesn't look like my cousin in my head! If you know me well enough, you know exactly who my mind has already cast for his role in my imaginary movie lol

The role of one of Angela's childhood mentors was originally named Sara...If I remember correctly, I struggled a little with it even in the beginning because I have a sister of the same name. I can't even tell you my original motivation for choosing the name aside from the fact I was probably trying to stick with a biblical theme as it was originally meant to be 'Christian fiction'. And I'm stubborn and don't want to admit when I'm wrong. I left the mentor of Irish descent, even though it doesn't fit with the traditional idea of a karate sensei...because I know for a fact it's something which crosses cultural lines. But the name didn't fit with the ancestry, especially if she was Irish enough to have a faded accent. So I cast about on the internet and rechristened her Maeve...more to do with the brief Criminal Minds' character than the etymology of the name.

I renamed Angela's birthmother Janine in nickname only. Jannie felt clunky to me, so I added an E and Jeannie flows off the tongue a whole lot easier. Same with a minor side character never seen and only mentioned...Rena to Trina.

Ah, personality changes. Probably the most notable was the switch between Angela's mother and grandmother. I reread the story and realized it didn't make sense for the grandmother to be more accepting of Angela than her mother was, especially if part of the reason was Maude's own desire for her mother's approval. So I had to make Grandma Pearl, who though she is loved, is a bit judgier than she had been previously. Maude still falls on the judgy side because of this, and because she feels her own early life choices were a mistake (because her mom said so) and doesn't want her own daughter following down the same path...even though for Maude it is the path which led her to her husband Philip...so she's got a bit of her own complex going on too. Don't we all?

Another minor personality change was in the character Kevin. Craig's college roommate and closest friend - he is also a medical doctor specializing in psychiatry (because I'm an armchair psychiatrist lol) who has been aware of his friend's issues the entire time - although he didn't learn of his friend's abuse until their sophomore year and Craig was refusing to sleep after returning from spending spring break at his father's home. There is NO WAY he'd have let Craig continue avoiding his issues as long as he did in the original manuscript...especially after making the two-hour trip to remove a gun from Craig's home to make contemplating suicide harder for him. Kevin's own sister suicided when they were teens, and this event would have scared him even more than Craig's post-spring-break behavior.

I failed to follow through on some of the foreshadowings in Craig's Dragon Dream, so I had to tweak the ending. It wasn't an easy decision, but the more I considered what I had already written, it was already there and I just had to follow through with it. It made Angela's reticence to go home with her husband after waking up from her coma much more believable and understandable. Also, I failed to deliver on the harassment Angela went through prior to the kidnapping...so I gave the phone calls more descriptions...which in some cases called for changes in the scene around them. I also added mentions of items in her apartment being out of place, of it not feeling right to her. I don't focus on it, because at this point in her relationship with her ex-boyfriend, she's accepted the harassment as normal even though it scares her.

Let's be honest, there is a certain level of harassment women take for granted on a daily basis anyway.

But anyways.

Some scenes I simply told from a different person's perspective. The deli manager Becky, or the state trooper Erica. Because I also failed to show the small imaginary town of Tyler's Grove rallying around the budding romance like I said in the book's back cover synopsis.  Not everyone supports them, but enough to make an impact on Craig...who even though he's lived there for a decade, doesn't feel like he belongs. Minor issues, easily fixed.

It feels like the story has a smoother flow now, and even though it's long (lover of epic stories), I don't think it has the drag I felt from my read through. Granted my perspective is different, but I think my readers will end up agreeing with me. I hope so anyway!

Much love!

The Farmer's Daughter - Part 1

As my manuscript is being sent to Beta readers for a read through, I thought I'd take some time to talk about the novel. What it and the series is about, why you should reread it if you already read it the first time I published it, why I made some of the changes I did, and why I write about the subject matter that I do.

I think I'll start with the name of the overall series. It was originally called The Country Music Series because I had this cute idea to name the books after country songs thinking it would be 'ok' since the books had nothing to do with the story the song told. But, then I did some more research and realized I was flirting with trademark infringement. You know, trying to use the popularity of the song to promote my own work. Depending on the artist involved, they might not appreciate that.

For example, the song Farmer's Daughter is about a guy going to work for a farmer and falling in love with his daughter while my novel is about the farmer's daughter going to work in a general/grocery store and falling in love with the owner. By keeping the series name The Country Music series, I'm actually being dishonest and trying to trick readers into reading my books. I didn't realize it at first, but now that I've realized my mistake I'm going to do my best to fix it.

So, the series is now called: The Dragon Dream and this is why.

Number one...the male lead character, Craig Moore, suffers from a recurring nightmare he and his best friend Kevin dubbed the Dragon Dream while they were still sharing a dorm room in college. Because - it revolved around Craig's battle with a dragon. His damaged psyche cast his abuser in the role of a dragon which kills him repeatedly in his dreams. As the story progresses, the dream foreshadows events in the real world - it takes him a while to catch on, even after the demon known as the Beast enters them. Like, he's only 'kind of' figuring this out at the end of book two.

The dream/vision near the end of the book features both Craig and his love interest, Angela. The closest I've come to having a shared dream myself, are the few times my husband and I have dreamed about the same subject matter on the same night. However, this is fiction and I most decidedly ran with it. As the one deceased character answered when asked: Is it a dream? “No. It’s…some would call it purgatory, some heaven, some hell. It’s different for everyone. I call it the razor-thin edge between life and death, between dreams and reality."

Hence, the reason why I say I write fantasy as well as romance. Not to mention, one of my antagonists is a 'minor' demon...and the dog Princess is an angel in disguise. But that there is probably a whole other blog post!

Not my picture I'm afraid. Stole it. Jail me.
I can't even find a link for the original,

Sadly, different fonts don't translate into Kindle e-books, but I also give the Dragon Dream scenes an extra indent from the rest of the story. It's a separate battle in Craig's mind...and yet it is a battle between two worlds blending together. In his dream, Craig is battling for his freedom from the oppression of his abuse and the deep guilt it left him over his sexual desire and identity. As Cassie says in the second novel, in many ways he was struggling to come out as straight. Craig's actual dreams are the only time scenes in that realm are indented more. Any time Angela steps into the same realm, it is the same font and indentation because to her there is no separation of realities. Something none of the characters are aware of yet, but I'll tell you that much.

Also, since the story itself was birthed from a dream I had years ago...I figure it's only fitting! The dream was nowhere near as entertaining as the novel is, I'm afraid. The only thing which remains is the main character's life being in danger because she was dating the man she was working for. And that's about it. The dream I had was also a lot shorter - but that's because once I killed the seed the dream planted, the darn thing sprouted all over the place.

I'm too late for this to be my usual Monday blog, but I was busy tweaking stuff yesterday and every time I changed windows to try and start a post...my brain jammed up. So, as I'm waiting for feedback on the changes I've made I'm going to write up a few blogs posts, schedule them and get started on weeding out the dross in Ring of Fire.

Much love to all.